Friday, June 4, 2010

Celebrate Good News

Master This Habit to Keep Your Relationships Healthy

Conventional relationship wisdom says that being supportive during times of loss and sadness is a good way to strengthen a relationship bond, right? It turns out, however, that celebrating good news with each other may mean even more. Researchers who studied couples’ interactions say that the happiest pairs are those who respond positively to their partners' successes. “This was the strongest predictor of current and future relationship satisfaction,” says Shelly Gable, PhD, psychology professor at the University of California at Santa Barbara, who led the study.

Why It’s So Powerful

Favorable feedback does more than just flatter. “It validates accomplishments, but it also validates your relationship by showing that you get what’s important to each other,” says Michele Marsh, PhD, a clinical director for the Council for Relationships in Philadelphia. Plus, talking to your guy about what occurred lets him relive it a bit, only this time he’ll associate the positive rush with you. The reverse response is also telling. If you’re not stoked by what your guy considers a win, it conveys that you may be jealous, threatened, or just not interested. That may be why couples in the study who weren’t thrilled by each other’s good fortune were more likely to break up down the line.

The rest of the article here.

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